Well... Let's try again. It's hard to get started and change bad habits. I'm so uncomfortable in my own body and I know that if I just try a little harder, I can succeed! I'm having a bit of an inner struggle right now.
I am a stress eater. My in-laws are visiting -- all of seven of them! My mother-in-law has a major sweet tooth and brings lots of candies -- caramels, toffees, cake -- with her and then wants to go out for ice cream every night. She means well, she wants to treat everyone, but it's so stressful to me and I feel so guilty for eating it, and not eating it! So I eat it, get a sugar high and feel good for a little while, get a dip and eat some more, feel terrible and eat more. Of course it's all on the counter, easily accessible to everyone. And then she brings the box around to everyone to take some.
Just writing this I find myself getting super stressed out and want to go drink some Dr. Pepper -- which I want to stop drinking more than anything! But it's not that simple for me. I don't drink it everyday...maybe only once or twice a week. But it's satisfying. I crave it.
I have really low self-esteem and willpower. I don't want to sound self-righteous or anything, but I'm a pretty good person. I don't have any temptations...except food. I enjoy the taste, it's pleasurable for me. I use to watch The Biggest Loser and see people that were addicted to food and I would judge them. I would say that I wasn't addicted to food and that they just need to get over it. Stop whining and eat salad. (I love salads, but you know what I mean) :)
So yeah.... rambling. Frustrated with myself. Going to try harder tomorrow. Going to pray. Lots. I need encouragement. I need to feel successful.
Change can be hard and scary but you can do it. Sometimes its one minute at a time.
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